


past the ticking clock (time never truly stops)

by mercer



Category: fromis_9 (Band)
Genre: F/F, and we now have all the relationships tagged!, anyway other pairings will come around when we get to them, im just tagging the relationships that have been seen so far, it goes very well, syeon and chaeng have a heart to heart, yay gyulromsun tag!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-06
Updated: 2020-06-19
Packaged: 2020-06-23 13:16:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19702135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mercer/pseuds/mercer
Summary: "as long as we have something to come back to, we are never truly alone."a collection of one-shots set in the same universe in no particular chronological order.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this is set in an alternate universe where nakyung, chaeyoung, seoyeon, and jiheon meet each other during college and are the same age.
> 
> seoyeon is taking up music, nakyung is taking computer science, jiheon is taking chemical engineering, and chaeyoung is an english major.
> 
> saerom, gyuri, and jisun have already graduated. they also live together in the apartment across jiheon and nakyung's. saerom works as a dance choreographer, gyuri is in the army (composes songs and plays gigs with hayoung when not away), and jisun owns a well-known restaurant.
> 
> jiwon works as a barista at the local café hoping to earn enough money to go to uni and study music, and hayoung is a famous traveling musician that takes gigs anywhere in korea, though she always comes back to yangpyung where her friends are.
> 
> also i might sometimes upload chapter that arent proofread so forgive any mistakes in like, the first twenty-four hours of being uploaded. 
> 
> now without further ado, please enjoy!

"jiheon-ah," nagyung plops down onto their apartment's sofa where jiheon is reading what looks to be a reviewer for the upcoming midterms.

"hm~?" jiheon hums, eyes never once leaving the paper she's holding. 

nagyung pouts, upset at being ignored. leaning on jiheon's shoulder, she starts playing with the sleeves of the other girl's shirt to appease her boredom. once she's bored of _that_ , she looks over to the paper jiheon is reading. 

jiheon could sometimes be such a workaholic that nagyung can't help but worry. "she's as stubborn as gyul," saerom and jisun would say whenever they come visit from across the hall. 

"jiheon-ah, stop studying and play with me~" nagyung swipes the paper from jiheon's hands and promptly sits on it, keeping it from her roommate's reach.

"yah, lee nagyung! give it back!" jiheon tries to take it back, but nagyung's sitting on it, and she _really_ doesn't want to touch the other girl's behind.

"only if you play with me." 

scratching her head, jiheon tries moving nagyung, but the other girl just wouldn't budge. she knows she could just lift nagyung but she's honestly also feeling a bit guilty for ignoring her girlfriend like that.

finally jiheon relents."fine." nagyung cheers, " _but_ on one condition."

nagyung crosses her arms. "alright, what is it?"

smirking, jiheon answers. "i get internet priorities tonight." 

"what?! but i need to watch our next opponent for a better chance of winning!"

"for interrupting me while studying, i think this is pretty fair nakko-yah."

nagyung huffs. "fine. but only for tonight."

jiheon nods. "only for tonight." 

brightening up, nagyung quickly pulls jiheon up from the couch and pushes her towards their bedroom. 

"go get changed!"

"what, why?"

"we're going out!"

\-------

dressed in a gigantic hoodie with nagyung clinging onto her in a similar hoodie but white, jiheon wonders where they're going; knowing nagyung, they'd probably go to an arcade to play.

"so," jiheon starts. "where are we going?"

nagyung wags a finger at her and winks, "it's a surprise."

"a surprise? why?"

"stop asking questions and trust me, jiheon." nagyung holds onto jiheon's arm tightly and stares up at the taller girl, cheeks puffed up in exasperation.

jiheon raises her hands up in mock surrender, "i got it, i got it. i'm looking forward to it, nakko-yah."

facing forward, nagyung intertwines her fingers with jiheon's, humming a small tune. jiheon looks down at their hands and allows a small smile on her face; she loves nagyung so much that sometimes it's unbearable.

here, strolling through yangpyung's busy streets, jiheon feels like she's home.

\-------

"so we were going to the arcade." jiheon mumbles quietly, stuffing her hands into the hoodie's pockets as she catches up to the smaller girl who had run up ahead. 

it was an arcade dearly beloved to their friend circle, a place where they've been to countless of times, and a place jiheon could also consider something special; something that held a lot of sentimental value, if you will.

"jiheon-ah, hurry up!" nagyung shouts a distance away from her, already disappearing around a corner as she said that. jiheon does as told, walking in longer strides to see what her girlfriend's cooked up this time.

as she rounds the corner, a balloon immediately smacks her in the face, followed by a series of party poppers going off at the same time. just as she goes to remove the balloon from her vision, she hears a chorus of shouts.

"WELCOME HOME GYURI-UNNIE!"

and jiheon stands there in utter bewilderment, covered in an assortment of colored streamers and confetti, and holding a balloon a tad bigger than her head.

"what-"

"i told you guys it was jiheon coming but you all wouldn't listen!" she hears nagyung shout over the voices of at least five other people complaining about wasting yet another set of party poppers. "now we have to clean this mess up!"

among the noise, jiheon's brain finally registers what had been shouted moments prior.

"gyuri-unnie is back?"

all noise comes to a stop as they all look over like deer caught in headlights. she sees nagyung approach her, an apologetic look on her face.

"um, surprise?" she says, "okay, jiheon-ah, i was supposed to keep you from studying until your eyes jumped out of their sockets while the unnies, seoyeon, and chaeng gathered here to set this up for gyuri-unnie and also by extension you because we all know the bond you and gyuri-unnie have and so we wanted to i guess maybe surprise you both?" 

"surprise who?"

everyone turns to the voice in surprise, jiheon turning around so fast she could pass as a ballet dancer doing a pirouette. there, in all her camoflauge-gear glory, stands jang gyuri, a hefty backpack slung on her left shoulder and carrying four boxes of donuts in her right hand.

when a beat passes and not one person has said anything, gyuri looks around in confusion. "what's...what's with this silence? are you all not happy to see me?"

and just as she's said that, her backpack and the donuts drop to the floor as four people try to jump on her, seoyeon even going so far as to climb on her back. gyuri hugs all of them back, albeit with a frown and an exasperated huff, because of course she loves them but she also appreciates the joys of a _not broken back, i mean she's already growing old as is no need to add back problems to the future-_

"GYURI-UNNIE YOU'RE BACK!"

jiheon lifts her head from where she had buried into gyuri's chest, giving her a wide smile, and gyuri in turn returns it with one of her own. jiheon hugs the girl tighter, resuming her previous position on gyuri's chest, the smile never leaving her face.

jiheon feels nagyung and chaeyoung detach from gyuri, seoyeon hopping off of gyuri's back soon after. she feels her unnie straighten up and starts to let go of the tight grip she had had on the girl earlier.

she watches as gyuri moves over to the rest of the party, watches as gyuri gives jiwon an affectionate headlock-and-noogie, watches as she does some overly-complicated handshake with hayoung; watches as she goes over to saerom and jisun, hugging them both so tight and lifting them from the ground, spinning around as saerom and jisun fervently yell at gyuri to let them down.

she watches as her friends, her family, laugh together and celebrate, and she feels a warmth overtake her chest; a warmth so bubbly and full that she might explode.

she feels nagyung beside her intertwine their hands together, and as she looks over, she sees a wide and content smile blossom on her own. 

"jiheon-ah, nagyung-ah, what are you both doing there standing around?" gyuri calls from the table where the rest of their friends are gathered, sporting smiles as wide as their own. 

nagyung tugs on jiheon's hand ever so slightly, urging her to move forward, and jiheon thinks she doesn't mind spending the rest of her life like this.


	2. kisses [gyulsun-centric + saerom at the end]

"gyul? are you home?"

jisun calls out as she sees a pair of worn blue converse haphazardly laid out at the doorstep. jisun sighs in exasperation at the sight, when will gyuri ever learn to take her shoes off properly?

"yeah, im in the kitchen!" 

after fixing gyuri's shoes and depositing her own, jisun makes her way to the kitchen where the smell of ramyeon catches her attention.

"gyul, you're cooking? it's not even 5:30 yet." jisun notes, hovering over gyuri at the stove because she doesnt _quite yet_ trust her with anything related to fire.

"oh, romsae said she'd be home a little late, and i didnt know you were coming home so soon so i..."

"so you just went ahead and made yourself ramyeon for dinner?" jisun sighs, "aish, jang gyuri, how many times have i told you ramyeon is not a good dinner meal?"

gyuri just scratches her neck, "sorry jisun-ah, my mind must have still been with the military camp since that was what most of our meals had been."

feeling slightly alarmed hearing that, jisun immediately grabs gyuri's face in her hands to look if she had grown abnormally thinner. as jisun turns her head left and right, gyuri tries to squirm out of her grasp, her hands grabbing at the younger's wrists to pry them off.

"im fine, jisun-ah, im fine!" jisun gives her a disbelieving stare. "really, im fine! it wasnt what we ate everyday, only for the majority when we were out and about. back at the base we ate actual healthy food, so dont worry."

jisun, still obviously worried about her love's less than stellar eating habits, crosses her arms with a pout. gyuri smiles at this, arms going to wrap her in a tight hug. 

"aigoo, always so worried our jisunnie... i can take care of myself, okay? even though i rely a lot on you and saerom, i can still be trusted in taking care of myself."

jisun lets out a sigh, returning gyuri's hug before letting go, allowing gyuri to go back and attend to the ramyeon she was cooking. 

when a lull in gyuri's constant stirring of the pot comes, said gyuri turns to look at jisun, jisun in turn looking up at her questioningly. 

without saying a word, gyuri leans down and gives jisun a chaste kiss on the lips, a goofy smile spreading on her face. having not expected that, jisun could feel her face warm, eyes averted in embarrassment.

"wha-what was that for?" jisun stutters out, barely recovered from gyuri's sudden attack. 

with a smile still on her face, gyuri turns back to the pot on the stove, "i just thought that you were really beautiful so i wanted to give you a kiss."

feeling her face heat up considerably even more, jisun burrows into the taller girl's shoulder, but not before giving her a good smack which earns her an 'ow' and a light chuckle.

"where did you learn to be so smooth..." she mumbles into the fabric of gyuri's sweatshirt. 

"i was just stating the truth, jisun-ah." gyuri replies, turning the stove off and placing the lid onto the steaming pot of ramyeon to let the residual heat cook it fully.

gyuri turns around and wraps her arms fully around the shorter girl, burying her face into jisun's hair. her hands naturally come to rest at the latter's waist, jisun's hands coming up to her back to grip the fabric there tightly. 

they stay for a while, basking in each other's warmth, neither willing to break the long over-due embrace.

"jisun-ah." gyuri mumbles into her hair, fingers threading softly through the brown locks. 

jisun, who had gone to lying in the crook of gyuri's neck, gives a noncommittal "hm?"

"i love you." she punctuates it with another kiss to jisun's forehead. 

not being able to help the smile making its way onto her face, jisun breaks their hug momentarily to look at gyuri properly. she cradles her love's ( _one of her two loves_ , jisun corrects) face, her thumb running over a particularly ugly scar gyuri had gotten facing a skilled knife wielder; it went from her cheek diagonally to her jaw, the jagged slash leaving uneven bumps on her once flawless face. 

she kisses the marred skin, as if to soothe the already past pain. she meets gyuri's eyes, sees the pure love and adoration in them that she cant help but wrap her arms around her love's neck and bring her head down for a deep kiss. gyuri responds in kind, bringing her hands to the small of jisun's back and pulls her closer.

they kiss for as long as their lungs allow, pulling apart once said lungs gasp for air. jisun's hands had long abandoned gyuri's neck and had entangled themselves in the taller girl's hair. gyuri's hands hadn't wandered beyond jisun's hips, just resting at her waist, grip gentle as if she were afraid to hurt her.

(jisun appreciates the gesture, appreciates that even with seven years passing, gyuri still treats her as softly as she had done during their first years together.)

gyuri rests her forehead against jisun's, the goofy smile from before returning to her face.

seeing gyuri smile with such unbridled joy, jisun gives her a bright smile of her own, a laugh bubbling up and escaping. 

gyuri smiles wider, happy to see jisun laughing with such abandon, and she joins in, sneaking small kisses on the other's lips. 

"i love you too, gyul."

jisun is the first to pull away from the embrace, nimbly moving around the kitchen to get their utensils. looking at gyuri, she gestures to their modest dining table.

"come on, gyul, help me set the table."

gyuri salutes, smile still on her face. "aye aye, captain!"

jisun could only shake her head in amusement.

\---

as saerom unlocks the door to her, jisun, and gyuri's apartment, she sees both jisun's and gyuri's shoes by the doorstep. at the thought of her two most important people, she smiles as the fatigue she felt from choreographing a 12-member dance routine melted away. 

taking her own shoes off and placing them neatly beside the worn converse and black wedges, she calls out into the apartment. "im home!"

not hearing the usual "welcome home!" greetings, saerom moves to investigate; her bath could wait a while. 

first walking into the kitchen, she finds a bowl, chopsticks, and a pot of (probably cold) ramyeon waiting for her on the table. making a note to eat that after her bath, saerom continues to look.

catching a faint noise coming from the living room, she comes in to find an endearing sight; both jisun and gyuri had fallen asleep on the couch watching what saerom could only assume to be spongebob reruns. they both were both lying on the couch, gyuri on the outside of the couch, one arm on jisun's hip and the other under both their heads acting as a pillow. jisun had buried her face in gyuri's chest, arms around the other's waist. 

snapping a quick picture, saerom grabs a blanket from their storage closet and drapes it over jisun and gyuri. she kisses their heads goodnight, smiling softly, before heading to the bathroom for a long, relaxing bath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i dont know how military bases/camps of any kind work lol


	3. croissants ruin everything [hawon]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which old memories are brought up and new ones are made.

"welcome to on the rise café!" 

jiwon sighs as she slumps onto the cafe's counter after serving the twentieth customer in the last hour. it's not that she doesn't want more customers coming in (she does, in all actuality, because more customers meant a raise in salary after all), but today had been a particularly tiring day so who could blame her?

just shy of rush hour, a customer decided that today would be jiwon's worst nightmare as they tripped on _absolutely_ _nothing_ and proceeded to knock down their display of books and figurines ( _'thank god those figurines were plastic,'_ ).

needless to say, jiwon was the one who had to clean the mess up as she was the only one without anything to do at that time. the customer had apologized profusely and offered to help clean up, but jiwon declined, because what sensible service staff lets a customer clean up? was jiwon's line of thought, but looking back on it now, maybe she should have taken up the customer's offer.

why? simply because rush hour had started while she was cleaning up the mess. the staff at the bar were stretched thin as dozens of people came pouring in through the doors of the café.

her co-workers (a total of three people) were rushing behind the counter, and they were calling for her to hurry up, so hurry up she did. they served customer after customer, jiwon helping the other barista make the drinks, and finally got a break once 7 pm rolled around. 

which brings her back to where she is now, slumped over on the rise café's counter nursing a steaming cup of herbal tea. 

her co-worker, chaeyeon, just laughs. "rough day today, huh?"

jiwon heaves a big sigh, "tell me about it... manager had a field day with me. hope he raises my pay a bit to make up for this."

chaeyeon laughs again, her laugh echoing through the now empty café, "don't keep your hopes up on that, unnie. manager is a bit stingy with anything that's not food."

jiwon sighs, quietly sipping her herbal tea as she hears chaeyeon tidying up in the back room. just as she's finished her cup, chaeyeon's voice pipes up from behind her. 

"looks like we have another customer, unnie." she could _hear_ the smirk in chaeyeon's voice. 

grumbling, she sets her cup down and faces the café's doors, not bothering to hide her contempt at serving another customer close to closing time. that contempt melts away as she sees who's at the door. 

"yo, jiwonnie," hayoung says, smiling goofily while holding up a peace sign.

jiwon sports the same goofy smile as she all but runs to hug hayoung. she collides with the musician, taking care to not damage the guitar slung on her shoulder. (god knows how much that costs, jiwon's savings would all go down the drain if she had to replace it.)

"habbang!" jiwon exclaims as she breaks their hug, holding hayoung by the shoulders. "why are you here? aren't you supposed to be in gwang-ju right now?"

hayoung chuckles at the younger girl's energy, "i decided to take a little break before going back on the road, and what better place to rest at than back home?" 

jiwon's smile grows even wider at the statement, hayoung mirroring it with one of her own. they move over to the counter where jiwon's forgotten cup resides, jiwon going behind the counter to finish cleaning up the bar. hayoung helps herself to one of the stools by the counter, guitar placed on the ground by her side. 

"anything to order, unnie?" 

hayoung looks up at the menu boards situated above the bar, a hand coming up to stroke her chin in deep thought. the sight makes jiwon laugh, because even now when they're practically adults, hayoung has always remained the same girl she knew from way back then.

"i think... i'll take a dark mocha frappe with mint, and also a croissant." 

jiwon doesn't hide the scrunch of her nose as she hears the other woman's order; hayoung must have also noticed as she gives a light laugh at the face she's making. 

"not a big fan of mint, jiwon-ah?" hayoung says, amusement evident in her voice. jiwon watches as she leans back on the barstool, hands reaching for the guitar leaning next to her. hayoung takes it out off the case and proceeds to play a soft melody. 

with hayoung's playing as her bgm, jiwon proceeds to the other side of the bar to start making the accursed drink. after hearing a lull in the musician's plucking, jiwon decides to defend herself against hayoung's obvious mirth from earlier.

"it's not that i don't like mint," jiwon begins. "it's just... you know," she pauses to focus on getting the whipped cream _just right_. "it brings up not-so-pleasant memories."

she hears the guitar stop, and turns to meet hayoung's gaze, warm brown intently looking at jiwon's own. her breath hitches as hayoung smiles at her warmly, eyes softening as she places her guitar down. she leans forward on the counter, head placed down on her arms, and never once breaks eye contact.

and jiwon just stares at the other woman, stares as if she was in a trance; she remembers how to breathe (when had she held her breath?) when she hears hayoung start to speak.

"you're still not over her?" 

she breaks her gaze away from the other woman, going over to the display case and taking the lone croissant from its place on a tray; just to have something to do with her hands. they wait for the croissant to heat in a blanket of silence jiwon's not fond of at all (and that says something, because even silences with hayoung give jiwon a sense of warmth and comfort; this one just felt stifling and murky and _just too uncomfortable_ ).

(jiwon wishes that chaeyeon would just pop out of the back room and break the silence, but she highly doubts the younger girl hadn't left through the back the moment hayoung showed up at the doors.)

"jiwonnie?" 

jiwon doesn't take her eyes off the machine heating the croissant and idly wonders why hayoung's voice sounds so much closer than it had before. before she could pursue the train of thought any further, she feels a pair of callused hands grab her own, prompting her to turn around.

she meets hayoung's gaze again, but this time she doesn't think she has it in herself to look away.

"jiwon-ah..." hayoung whispers, "it's been so long, you know?" her hands move to cup her face, "you've been holding onto this for seven, no, maybe more years. don't you think it's time to let go?"

jiwon brings her own hands up, covering hayoung's. "it's not that simple, unnie." she closes her eyes, leaning in to the other's touch. "trust me; if i could get my feelings to disappear by just saying a magic word, i would have done so the moment i knew it was hopeless." 

"then, would you allow me to help you?" 

her eyes immediately open, staring at the older girl. "unnie... are you saying..."

a determination jiwon has seen countless times before sets in hayoung's eyes. "i love you, park jiwon. and i want you to be happy. as much as possible, i want to help you with your happiness; that is, if you'd let me?"

and jiwon sees it, sees how much hayoung truly cares for her, and without her knowledge, her heart has finally begun to beat for someone else.

"of course, hayoung-unnie. i wouldn't have wanted it to be anyone else." 

jiwon doesn't know when she'll be able to say those three words back, but if it was with hayoung, she doesn't doubt that she'll be able to.

and she doesn't know who started to lean in first, but they found themselves inching closer all the same. just as their lips were about to touch,

**_BEEP BEEP BEEP_ **

they jump apart so fast like they had both been caught doing something inappropriate that jiwon almost laughs out loud. she turns to face the offending machine, gingerly taking out a croissant just as fresh as if it were just baked.

she looks over to the recipient of the baked good, eyes looking anywhere but at her, face considerably flushed. jiwon thinks it's absolutely adorable.

brandishing the tray of dark mocha with mint and a croissant, jiwon turns to place into hayoung's hands. this time, she lets out a loud laugh when she sees her unnie eye the croissant with such contempt.

"why are you glaring at the croissant like it murdered your whole family?" jiwon manages to say between laughs.

hayoung pouts at her (jiwon won't admit that she died just a little seeing it), "im not glaring."

letting one final chuckle slip through, jiwon rests her forehead against the other woman's, "don't worry," she whispers. "we have all the time in the world, song hayoung-ssi."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's all up to you guys on who you imagine jiwon's former crush is (though i think its pretty obvious). not yet proofread since i just finished this in a burst of inspiration at 1 am


	4. right now [seoyeon + chaeyoung]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a little talk about falling in love.

"so," chaeyoung starts.

when she doesn't say anything for a full minute, seoyeon feels obligated to prompt her further.

"so?"

"sorry, went to collect my thoughts a little." seoyeon looks to her roommate with an exasperated smile, but gives no other reply. 

seeing this as a sign to continue, chaeyoung says, "so, i've noticed something. everyone, and i mean _everyone_ we know is dating one way or another."

she continues by opening her instagram and scrolling through her feed filled with pictures of their friends out on dates with their significant others. "look at them, syeonnie!" 

she practically shoves her phone in seoyeon's face as she shows her an instagram post made by jiwon. 

"even jiwon-unnie and hayoung-unnie have started somewhat dating!" she all but screeches.

when seoyeon grabs chaeyoung's phone from her, she's greeted by a picture of jiwon and hayoung at a quaint restaurant making (what seoyeon could only assume to be) heart-eyes at each other. the caption read, _"i can't call this a date, but i think it's pretty close <3"_.

"wow, jiwon-unnie and hayoung-unnie? i never thought i'd see the day," seoyeon remarks, placing the guitar she was fiddling with beside her to take the phone with both hands. "i thought jiwon-unnie was going to take her first love to the grave and die old and alone, and that hayoung-unnie would never work up the courage to confess. colour me impressed."

but honestly, she was happy for the two of them; they both deserved only the best, and what kind of friend would seoyeon be if she didn't wish her friends' happiness? 

she scrolls through a bit more of chaeyoung's instagram feed, finding more posts from their friends out and about on dates.

chaeyoung takes her phone back with a big, dramatic sigh, " _oh, how love permeates the very air we breathe! to escape would be futile, methinks,_ " she bellows.

seoyeon looks at her roommate, sprawled on the sofa and the back of her hand covering her eyes as if she were a maiden that had fainted. she resists the urge to sit on top of chaeyoung (just to see the look on her face as she does so), and instead leans over the armrest of the chair she's occupying, a small smirk playing on her lips.

"its good to see that you actually _are_ an english major." she teases. that gets a rise out of the girl as she shoots up form her position as fast as seoyeon could rap.

"hey! what the hell is that supposed to mean?" she crosses her arms with a huff. 

seoyeon laughs, "its kinda hard to remember when you butcher shakespeare every chance you get." 

"doesn't the fact that i even _know_ shakespeare remind you?"

she's met with a shrug of shoulders. chaeyoung lets out another huff. 

"i'll have you know that i could wax poetic about the history of the word 'mellifluous'; all in english! i might add—and that's not what i wanted to talk about!" 

seoyeon feigns ignorance, the mirth never leaving her eyes. "it's not? i thought _for sure_ you wanted to discuss your english, you wouldn't have made that segway into shakespeare otherwise." 

"that was you!"

she lets out a big laugh at the way chaeyoung's voice went an octave higher as she refuted. her laughter is cut short by a pillow straight to her face, courtesy of one lee chaeyoung.

she's still laughing as she throws the pillow back to chaeyoung on the sofa, who has resorted to giving seoyeon the Look™. she grins back at the scowl directed at her, knowing she's won this round of banter. 

she abruptly falls beside chaeyoung, wrapping an arm around the taller girl's shoulders. seoyeon directs a smile towards the still-scowling giant, knowing in the way that chaeyoung's shoulders relax that she's not annoyed anymore.

"so, you were saying?" seoyeon prompts, watching as chaeyoung leans into the little side hug seoyeon's giving her. 

they both lounge on the sofa, basking in the peace of their apartment and in each other's presence, before chaeyoung speaks up again. 

"is it wrong to not fall in love, syeon?" 

seoyeon hums, closing her eyes as she gives her answer. "i don't think it is—wrong to not fall in love, i mean. what's brought this on all of a sudden?"

she hears chaeyoung sigh, feels the rise and fall of her shoulders as she takes a breath. "i don't know, it's just—all our friends are in love, and they always say that being in love is the best feeling in the world. but i just... i just feel like i won't ever be able to feel it."

seoyeon cracks an eye open as she feels chaeyoung leave her side. she sees her hugging her knees to her chest, and for someone so tall, to seoyeon right now she looked incredibly small. 

"when i was young, i had never had someone i liked, much less someone i loved; my mom said to give it time, that i'll eventually feel it, and that maybe i was just a little too young.

"but as time passed, nothing changed. everyone suddenly started talking crushes and admirers, they all had someone they fancied. but i was the odd one out; i felt left out as they talked about love."

seoyeon hears the way chaeyoung takes in a shaking breath, sees the way chaeyoung is trembling, and knows that she had been keeping this in for just a bit too long. so she just lets her talk, eyes closing once more.

"and so i thought, 'is there something wrong with me?' because everyone around me were falling in love. and i saw how _happy_ they looked as they talked about the person they loved. i wanted to experience that happiness too. i loved my friends, sure, but i had never been _in_ love.

"i just—i should be feeling love for someone, right? i should be feeling giddy, blushing and squealing at the sight of someone, _right_?"

and seoyeon could hear the desperation in chaeyoung's voice as she uttered, "then _why can't i?_ "

seoyeon hesitates for a beat, allowing chaeyoung to recollect herself.

"chaeyoung-ah," she finally calls. not bothering to wait for a reply, seoyeon continues, "right now. do you think you want to be in love?"

"right now?" she can hear the confusion in chaeyoung's voice. nonetheless, she gets a reply, "i... right now, i don't think i want to be."

"are you happy with that?"

a pause. "...i want to be."

"then there you have it." 

seoyeon opens her eyes, staring right into chaeyoung's. "society's made us think that you aren't truly the person you're meant to be if you don't fall in love. to me, i think it's just a bunch of bullshit too far ingrained into the human psyche. love for our family and friends? important. romantic love, however?never been a necessity."

seoyeon places a hand on chaeyoung's folded arms, giving a little squeeze for comfort.

"chaeng, right now, there's nothing for you to be worried about. maybe in the future you'll fall in love, maybe not. but never think that falling in love was ever necessary to being happy. if the you right now, the you that doesn't want to be in love, is perfectly happy as she is now, then isn't that enough?"

seoyeon could only see a flash of tears streaming down the other's face before she's pulled into the biggest hug chaeyoung's ever given her. (granted, chaeyoung doesn't give her a lot of hugs in the first place.)

she cant help but smile as she hears the mumbled "thank you"s in her ear. chaeyoung has probably spent most of her life waiting to be told that it was okay, that it wasn't wrong to not be able to fall in love.

and seoyeon and understands, because she had been the same too. filled with the same anxieties and insecurities until she learned to just live her life as who she is. and if not being able to fall in love just so happened to be part of who she is, then she'll just shrug and be on her way.

pulling chaeyoung closer, seoyeon tries to give her the best comfort she could offer, because god knows she need it.

right now, they were just happy to have each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy pride @ everyone questioning or recently finding out about themselves, all of you are valid and loved 
> 
> i identify as aroace (aromantic and asexual) and have only recently come to terms with myself. aroaces are generally forgotten about during pride and even in lgbtq+ communities, so im here to tell you all that we are here and that we exist.


End file.
